[Download] ➾ Here Be Sexist Vampires By Suzanne Wright – Horse-zine.co.uk

10 thoughts on “Here Be Sexist Vampires

  1. says:

    I am so excited I just discovered a new vampire series And I am beyond thrilled Suzanne Wright has created the most exciting and yes, different world of vampires in her Deep in Your Veins Series.Three different kinds of vampires,.and each vampire with their very own special powers Three breeds Well you see, basically, you know how there are varying accounts of vampires Some humans report us to be terribly aggressive with hulk like strength, some report us to be entrancingly beautiful and charming, and others believe that we are actually human like than the stories say Well the reason for all the confusion is that there are actually different breeds The first book in the series, Here Be Sexist Vampires takes us into a world filled with gorgeous, sexy, mysterious and very very likeable characters.Samantha aka Sam is a London vampire, one of the lowest ranking vampire groups She joins Cat from Night Huntress series by Jeaniene Frost and Merit from Chicagoland Vampires by Chloe Neill as my three top kickass and fabulous vampire heroines.Sam is such an incredible and funny character She takes no shit from anyone She s smart and quick on the uptake Underneath all that smarty pants is someone with a vulnerable side someone who has been abused, seen and done some scary things in her life, and who has suffered loss and pain but she does not let that stand in her way I ve done things in my time that would make the curly hairs in your pants go straight,female or not, I reckon i ve got bigger balls than you have When she s offered a job working for Antonio, the Master of all Vampires, she sees this as the way to get away from Viktor, her tormentor and the vampire who turned her and has kept her prisoner since.Arriving at Antonio s compound, she s given the position of commander of the new vampire recruits, together with Jared, Antonio s heir and a total sexist and arrogant and gorgeous vampire of the highest ranking Wow, does this guy think a lot about himself And he s a total slut.has 3 consorts and just screws around Men if he was a women he d be considered a bit of a slut but apparently because he was a male it was completely normal and acceptable He actually thinks that Sam will give in to his sexiness.but man has he made a mistake in thinking that she s just a girl.oh did I forget to mention that Sam is the only female vampire ever to work with the legion vampire army She certainly knows how to put a dolt like him in place I loved the characters in this book Sam s vampire group, Antonio, Luther, Sebastian, Jared s 3 consorts talk about princesses and most of all, I fell in love with Sam s PA, Fletcher..totally lovable and adorable I want a Fletcher of my own He s such an unforgettable and engaging character and I can t get enough of him.I liked the interaction, sexual tension and chemistry between Sam Jared and loved watching the build up of the attraction that they felt for each other God, I loved this woman this very crazy, borderline homicidal on second thought, scrap the borderline woman How could you be attracted to someone who made you so pissed off that you d considered burning their balls with a lighter Another thing about this series that I totally love is the writing and the dialogue What Who Oh you mean that cross between a whippet and witch personally I don t know how he can shag something that looks like it s just escaped from Azkaban The author is British and the humour and wit come across each page Sam s vocabulary is a total blast Hilarious and so fabulous He had to be blowing smoke up my arse Okay there are some OTT moments and characters that are just so out there..but that s the magic in writing..anything is possible The funniest vampire book I have ever read just loved it Can t wait to start book 2..and join Sam Jared on their next vampiric adventure

  2. says:

    6 who s your mama stars Sam Female or not, I reckon I ve got bigger balls than you have Vampire Breed Svent tame and human likeSpecial Gift FeederPrevious Employment Chief AssassinFavorite weapon Bolts, beams, balls, but I like the whip best It s funand natural energies, the classical elements air, water, fire and earth Goal To finally be free of her Sire, Victor, by any means necessaryBest Described as very crazy, borderline homicidal on second thought, scrap the borderline woman Sam is the first female Svent Feeder who has tremendous control over her gift, leaving everyone who comes across her stunned and usually laying flat on their ass She gets offered a chance to try out to join the Grand High Master Vampire s private army and in return a chance to finally be free of her Sire, Victor, of three years Willing to take the risk of his wrath, she has no other option if she ever wants to no longer be his hostage, sex slave and assassin. Jared So you re prejudiced against women, young vampires, and against another breed of vampire I bet you re a delight to have around Vampire Breed Pagori super strong Special Gift Electrokinetic and TelepathyCurrent Employment Commander of the Grand High Master Vampire s private army Heir of the Grand High MasterFavorite weapon high voltage electricityGoal To train and lead the strongest army against the impending attack on the Grand High MasterBest Described as protective, demanding, controlling and master loverJared is the best of the best, that is why he holds the position he does today, but when Sam comes into his squad to try out he wants to prove to her that only real men can handle being a part of his squad He has no clue as to why Antonio would have offered Sam a position as a co commander after he refused to select her as part of the squad It was nothing personal, she just wouldn t be a good fit for the squad Isolated on an island Antonio, the Grand High Master, selects those he trusts dear to be around him One of his trusted adviser s, Luther, had a vision of an impending attack on the island, and determines it necessary that the new squad be trained and ready in the weeks to come Sam is no stranger to hard work, she knows she cannot just demand respectshe will need to prove it to this squad of chauvinists pigs And so help her God she doesn t cause bodily harm to any of them, especially the main pig himself, Jared How could you be attracted to someone who made you so pissed off that you d considered burning their balls with a lighter Sam is pissed off at herself for letting Jared get the best of her, why should she care how many consorts he has Why should she care what he thinks especially now that she finally has the freedom from her Sire and a place to call home As much as they try to ignore each other, there is no stop to the insults and the constant conflictit s all just foreplay for these two, and it s only a matter of time before the fire ignites and the inevitable occurs, when the two become one the battle of the bedroom begins Jared s lips were suddenly at my ear The only vampire who ll be manhandling you tonight is me If I let you Here Be Sexist Vampire is an amazing funny sexy tale, one I cannot believe I put aside for so long Ms Wright truly has a gift for creating a world you can live in with characters that you love or love to hate Sam is a temperamental, strong willed, sarcastic female who is a complete bad ass on and off the field She will only submit to a deserving partner, after of course she makes him work for it Jared was a strong alpha male lead, but he understood Sam and let her be who she needed to be no matter how much it drove him mad with concern The back and forth banter between Sam and Jared and the rest of the squad kept me laughing and dying for There is action, a little suspense and some sexy luvin too, what could you possibly ask for I had to admit I was kind of scared when I found out there was books for Jared and Sam, but this can be read as a stand alone as there is a sense of an ending and a promise of if you continue With these characters I had to jump right into the next book because I couldn t let go just yet, I was having way too much fin with them Awesome read for sure and recommended to all my paranormal lover friends.

  3. says:

    5 Sexy Sexist Vampire stars I freakin loved this book The chemistry between Sam and Jared was explosive Wow loved that she kicks his ass than once..Jared Jared is a super sexy, alpha male who never had a woman make him work for it and it was so much fun watching him and sam go at it.Sam Sam was a sexy, smart mouth woman with a great power and she kicked total ass.she pushes Jared and shows him and everyone else that just because you are a girl doesn t mean you can t kick major ass I loved her sassy comments and her powers were some of the coolest I have read. Great book I am on to the next one

  4. says:

    5 BITE ME STARS Well I love that sexist twat just because This book is immediately hitting my love you forever and ever shelf, and in honor of this fantastic author a new shelf has been added Addicted to this author This book was a real honest to goodness, I don t want to put you down ever page turner I ve had this book on my kindle for some time now and after feeling in the mood for a bit of paranormal loving I knew I could turn to this author and she would deliver and deliver she did I adored every last bit of this story here be sexist vampires is escape from reality perfection and it doesn t harm that it delivered on all my five star must haves Here are my vampishly excited book thoughts.What s it all about Samantha Parker has lived her vampire life under the control of her sire and captor, resigned to the fact that she is at the bottom of the pile and food chain when it comes to her importance as a vampire nothing comes as of a shock when she is approached by a vampire of royal like status to request she joins a legion of the highest regard, it looks like this sassy talented Svent vampire has just found her ticket to freedom Sam approaches her new position with confidence and new found excitement but that soon has a damper put on it in the form of her new co worker, heir to the Kingdom commander Jared Micheals, Jared doesn t appreciate having a female taking his side as his new colleague especially a vampire of such notably little status, Jared is than happy to do things his way or no way But Sam is not a vampire who is taking no for an answer and as her talents emerge so does a connection between this couple that can only be described as electric, but there are obstacles that stand in the way of this duo expressing how they really feel, can two people from different ways of life really make it the whole way to true love What did I love Undoubtedly I have to start my gushing thoughts by talking about Sam the books heroine Sam is brash, courageous, fearless and gorgeous I can t explain how much I loved this character her strength and beauty was as appealing as her humour and sarcastic nature this lady is a real ball breaker and the author holds nothing back in delivering a character that is completing unforgettable For every sassy heroine Suzanne Wright delivers in her books is an equally swoon worthy alpha, Jared ticked all my must have qualities for the perfect hero out there manly, unsure of his pull towards his love for the heroine, gorgeous without measure, some arse hole chauvinist tendencies and most of all over protective that girl is mine feelings wrap all this up with some paranormal vampire activity and I had the perfect couple chemistry, I could not get enough of this duo Here be sexist vampires was utterly entertaining it had a range of qualities brought together with a fantastic writing style that I m convinced most readers of this genre will be enthralled with Drama, romance, chemistry and between the sheet action that can t be measured in the hotness scales Final thoughts Here be sexist vampires takes the paranormal genre and gives it a hot comedy twist, the author is clearly a talented writer but you can also tell she enjoys what she does the love of her work leaks out of the pages and if I wasn t before I m now a firm fan This book is sexy hot, laugh out loud hilarious and Oscar worthy entertaining I can t recommend this book or the author enough Don t wait any longer, go grab it readers Enjoy Kisses.

  5. says:

    Oh my gosh, so much fun And, I had a few doubts at first, but they were quickly thrown out the window as the baddest badass female heroine ever made me want her in my girl tribe.Sam Samantha is in the weakest of the three vampire races, but she has a special ability that is rarely seen and is therefore offered a job with the vampire king Now, first I need to address the special snowflake syndrome that might go through your mind Yes, she s special, but she isn t the most powerful vampire ever, and she s not the fulfillment of some prophecy, or one of those girls who doesn t realize she s actually the most beautiful woman on Earth Also, if she wasn t special , would a book about a mundane vampire who does nothing be all that interesting No, not really Besides, once you meet Sam, you will allow a blizzard of special snowflakeness because she is so awesome.Jared is a sexist pig who has three mistresses who live together in an apartment waiting for their opportunity to serve him He s such an asshole that I really didn t want him to be her love interest for the first half of the book But, I was underestimating Sam She truly makes this guy work harder than the history of mankind to get on her good side I appreciate a good ball breaker when it is necessary In Jared s case, it was very necessary This guy needed a good old smack down.The two of them are forced to work together to prevent an attack on the Vamp King They mix together about as well as broccoli and chocolate Now, I know there is some freak out there who is saying, Oh, Jilly, I m a foodie and chocolate covered broccoli is the latest thing First of all, shut up We all eat food, therefore we are all foodies Secondly, how dare you blaspheme chocolate with vegetables We already have people eating chocolate covered bacon, chili peppers, and bugs When will the madness end No Just stop.There is a ton of sexual tension between these two as well much like the sexual tension between me and chocolate okay, I said it It s out there now And, it is just as fun and delicious.There is also a lot of magical fighting as the vampires are training for battle using their gifts Some of them can teleport, shoot poison, throw fire balls, astro project, and many other creative things I loved the scenes where they were dueling each other, and then when they had the big battle It made me really wish I could have a secret super power, you know, other than the ability to make a pint of ice cream disappear My other super power immediately follows that one and is called shame.The other part of the book that was fun for me, but could be difficult for some others was Sam s language She is British and speaks in Cockney slang often Although my husband is from the north, I still understood all of the slang, as he has used it at some point But, I think most Americans would wonder what the hell she is saying half the time Therefore, being the generous friend that I am, I have decided to provide you with a small glossary He didn t tot around having a gander I know what you are thinking a tator tot eating goose Of course But, in this case, it means that he didn t wander around looking at everything I know A tator tot eating goose would be fun But, it wouldn t make as much sense In this case ..there s really no point in telling me porky pies Why would someone tell someone else about a meat pie Did he make the meat pie Does he need a food taster No, and this is where it gets a little weird in England They have this entire vocabulary called Cockney Rhyming Slang, and it s super bizarre yet they all know it It works by substituting normal words or phrases with things that rhyme with them So, it seems that at some point, there were some Cockneys with waaaay too much time on their hands In the case of the above quote, porky pies means lies Yes, my hubs uses this one Along with many many others If he wants to have a butchers at my dog and bone, I am not offended or afraid for my dog s life It means he wants to look at my phone I know They are crazy and I married one he said innocently like butter wouldn t melt in his mouth Who really wants to melt butter in their mouth anyway We have microwaves for that I ve never considered melting it in my mouth and spitting it on my popcorn Maybe Paula Deen would roll that way, but not me But, for the Brits, this means that the person is playing it cool, nonchalant, aloof, coy In other words they are so chill that their mouths are literally cold inside Why is that a thing I have no idea.There are , but I m tired of typing, so if you have further questions, please direct them to me, Jilly, at www.google.comAnd, read this book It s fun.

  6. says:

    Re read of an old favorite Just as good the 2nd time around I Love it when the Heroine teaches the Hero a little RESPECT I read the sample of this book and Immediately bought it Samantha gets recruited to try out for a job to be a member of the Grand High Master Vampire s Guard She s a Badass and totally deserves the job.Samantha ParkerBut the Sexist Commander refuses to give it to her, especially after she whips his ass in competition But fate has bigger plans in store for Sam and her sexxy, sexist commander, Jared I had my ass kicked by a womanI had to laugh inwardly at myself the whole thing was so weird She had kicked my ass, embarrassed me in front of God knows how many people, and even called me a pretty girland all I d wanted to do was grab her, kiss her, and bite her Samantha is a total Badass assassin with amazing powers She s independent and doesn t require the approval of others But she is pissed with herself because she feels an attraction to Jared that she is physically unable to resist First I m going to play with these gorgeous tits here, suck on these pretty little nipples Then I m going to fuck you with my fingers and my tongue until you come in my mouth Only then will I slide my cock inside you It s not going to be slow and gentle, Sam I m going to fuck you hard and fast until you come so hard you scream And do you know what you ll scream My name OMG these two are wonderful together Jared has never met a woman that didn t fall to his feet in worship of his beauty or his power Sam and Jared bicker and their dialogue is witty and will keep you entertained The sex is hot and the love is sweet This is fast paced and full of action.I fell in love with Suzanne Wright after reading Feral Sins Her heroines are strong, feisty, and sarcastic Well this series is of what I love and I Highly recommend this series to my friends that love paranormal, erotic reads

  7. says:

    Re read 11th 12th February 2019Re read 9th July 10th July 2018Wow.The question I asked myself several times while reading this book was why haven t I read this sooner I suppose in this case it s easy since neither the title nor the original cover appealed to me I d continually skipped past it in fact it was only seeing my friends reviews come through that made me even look twice.The Phoenix Pack series by this author has been on my to read list for years and once I ve finished with Deep In Your Veins I m really going to have to get started on that.Anyway back to this book.Since I m late to the party there s already so many excellent reviews so I ll keep mine brief I ve spent years looking for a different, interesting vampire book and it was here all the time Yet even without the different vampires and their amazing powers this book is worth reading for Sam and Sam alone Here is a strong intelligent female the kind that is missing from so many books She s fabulous and a pleasure to read, there s no stupid here, no vacuous female that turns to idiot mode half way through making you wonder how she even dresses herself on a morning, Sam is brilliant.She starts strong and stays strong and the rest of the book is just as good, the only slight problem I had was Jared at times but there s a story there which I m sure will come out explaining his behaviour at times.This was so good and so enjoyable I m giving 5 which is a rating I don t often give and it s straight on to The Bite That Binds for me now.

  8. says:

    Listen book, I know it s not your fault that your author doesn t know what a thesaurus is, but I can t give you 5 stars when you use the word giggle in such excess that I want to cauterize the word out of you Why would any author use giggle, fucking giggle to describe how all the men laugh, at all times There are no guffaws, deep belly laughs, chuckles, or chortles to be had in this book You get a laugh or snicker here or there, but fuck the word giggle Now that that s off my back, to the actual contentThis book was similar ish to Chosen, if it was about vampires and not as slice and dicing awesome Sam is a Svente vampire with a colossally badass gift that allows her to control people s energies and the elements energies She s an avatar And I thought Aang was the last air bender She s described as a crazy and homicidal bitch I agree with this statement and appreciate her for it She s not a bitch in the way of you need to shank her, like she s got a snappy mouth on her She s in an all guy s world where there are zero female soldier vampires or Svente vampires She s ticking off a lot of hell no boxes for people and getting tons of flack for her vamp type and being a chick She responds with violence I like it It s always good to slap sense into men, and if that doesn t work, beat some Her job with the legion is to teach the recruits how to adeptly control their gifts energies All the men of course think they don t need help from a female, so she beats them, obviously Jared is kind of like Mr Cayan Pepper, except he puts out side eye to Cayan He desperately wants to put out actually, but Sam isn t into being another one of his consorts, which she describes as prostitutes that do it for free They re his mistresses I guess you could say and since he s not offering anything but that, she continuously declines him, even if they about set each other on fire with all the sexual tension Jared is a commander and not at all happy to be working with a female Svente, especially one that can totally beat his ass in a fight He s super misogynist, chauvinistic, and a right bastard to Sam for 90% of the book Possibly All throughout the book she proves to him again and again that she s awesome and he should watch out for a kick to the nuts if he makes another snide comment So that s the book Sam teaching the recruits, fending off the sexual attraction to Jared, showing the menfolk that she s powerful than they are, and waiting to battle The plot isn t huge, it s enough for this book I enjoyed the sense of humor in the book and reading about a new vampire myos.

  9. says:

    4 stars Well, what can I say Suzanne Wright has done it again She s the queen of the strong, feisty female leads and the deliciously brooding alpha males From the moment I started reading this book I could not put it down Chapter after chapter the story became interesting and before I knew it I d already reached the final page With all the fights and action going on as well as Sam and Jared s constant bickering, there was never a dull moment and all the equally unique side characters made the story all the fun to read So to sum it up there was a feisty, sarcastic, easy to like heroine a sexist, overprotective, easy to love lust after alpha male lots of action tons of sexual tension a original storyline the perfect amount of humor I mean, who wouldn t like all of that combined together, right

    Moving on to the next book right away No cliffhanger.

  10. says:

    I ve read the Phoenix pack series by this author, and since I loved those books, I thought I would give this one a try Holy shit this book was good I think I have a little girl crush on Sam She was take no prisoners fucking awesome I want to be her when I grow up Jaredhe was one hell of a hot badass, alpha asshole I love that asshole So when I grow up to be Sam, I want a Jared for myself I thought all books were about different characters, but it turns out that the first three books are about Sam and Jared and only the fourth one is about a different couple That s just fine by me, because the we get about Sam and Jared the better She totally kicked his asshole ass There are a lot of reviews out here, that explain what this book is about I m not going to, because I find it very difficult to explain paranormal books But if you love vampires, feisty strong funny females, hot alpha men, and some delicious steam, then I suggest you read this one 5 stars from me

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Here Be Sexist Vampires download Here Be Sexist Vampires, read online Here Be Sexist Vampires, kindle ebook Here Be Sexist Vampires, Here Be Sexist Vampires d83df29d4873 Sam Parker Is A Vampire With A Gift So Strong And Substantial That She Is Invited To Partake In A Test For A Place In The Grand High Master Vampire S Private Army She Finds That Not Only Has The Army Never Included A Woman, But It Has Never Included A Svent Vampire A Breed That Is Regarded By The Super Strong Pagori Breed And The Hypnotically Beautiful Keja Breed To Be Too Tame And Human Like Most Refuse To Take Her Seriously, Especially A Pagori Commander Named Jared Who She Craves In Spite Of HerselfThe Grand High Master, However, Sees Her Potential And Offers Her The Position Of Jared S Co Commander To Help Train The Newest Squad In Time For The Impending Attack On His Home Sam Has To Demonstrate To Jared And The Squad Of Chauvinists Why It Is Incredibly Foolish To Underestimate A Wilful, Temperamental, Borderline Homicidal Svent Female Warning This Novel Contains An Iron Willed Female Vampire With An Energy Whip, A Sexist Male Vampire Who Is Determined To Have Her, Explicit Vampy Sex, And A Romance Story With Real Bite